Posted on by Julie Deziel

Jump For Joy

Oh the joy of summer. The warm breezes blowing across the green grass. The sounds of kids chasing the sun to stay above the horizon just a little longer. The excitement of heading to the lake and the screaming race down the hill to the dock throwing off the shorts and shirt and the unbridled jump into the shock of the cool water. This is what the kids have waited for all those long spring days behind the desk of math and English classes. Summer anticipation is within sight…all that excitement and joy is just a bell ring away.

I am currently reading a book I received for my birthday from my husband, “The Second Mountain” by David Brooks. This book basically has said, “Julie this is what you were trying to figure out in your life right at this moment.” True story. In my 56 years of life I “believed” if I fulfilled certain requirements I would find happiness. I also equated the words joy and happiness together. I had my four beautiful children and they have brought me great joy along with my grandchildren. I found happiness in EMS and 911 dispatching, in friendships and other relationships. Climbing this mountain with these “joys” were all I would need because in our society culture pushes the belief that I should be happy with what I have attained on my climb. Well, yes I am/was happy. I met my culture goal…happiness and happiness is great! Granted I slipped off the side of it a few times. I have tumbled all the way to the bottom and was lodged in crevices for periods of times but I found my way out and climbed that same mountain, my mountain. I have reached the top of my mountain. I sat at the top of mountain I look out at the view…my life and have come to realize that there is more. There is more joy. There is more life. There is another mountain…the “second mountain.”

On the second mountain that I did not even know I was climbing was myself finding a life more centered on meaning and purpose. It is not a life of comparison or one of expectation, or a life that expresses prestige. It is a view of personal fulfillment in my marriage and family, to my faith, and to my well-being with a mental border. As I climb this second mountain I am finding true joy. As David Brooks writes in his book, “Happiness tends to be individual; we measure it by asking, ‘Are you happy?’ Joy tends to be self-transcending. Happiness is something you pursue; joy is something that rises up unexpectedly and sweeps over you. Happiness comes from accomplishments; joy comes from offering gifts. Happiness fades; we get used to the things that used to make us happy. Joy doesn’t fade. To live with joy is to live with wonder, gratitude, and hope.”

The excited thirteen-year-old runs and jumps off the dock and at that point she is committed. She plugs her nose and screams at the top of her lungs and jumps for joy into lake. Just as she is committed to that jump I am committed to all the joy I have through the wonder, gratitude and hope found through my transformation on my mountain.

Are you happy or do you have joy?

Posted on by Julie Deziel · 1 Comment

How Can You Not Smile?


Oh my!  The joy that a smile of a small child can emulate.  Who can resist the chunky cheeks and a hidden dimple that now presents itself?  A smile will cross each of our faces and for a moment in time the stress in our lives simply melts away.  That joy in their laughter is contagious and virtually pushes out any stress and difficulty that are held within ourselves.  

Working as a 911 dispatcher it often brings along extreme amounts of stress, I often search for ways to let go of the stress so I do not bring it home.  There are those calls that simply attach themselves to my shoulders and climb in the car with me that even listening to Ozzy Osbourne cranked so loud that even the deer turn their heads that does not drown them out.  They will sit there with me on the couch and crawl into bed with me doing their absolute best to ensure they are remembered.  Our brains are wired to remember; not forget.  It will work so very hard to remember even the worst memory.  It is a tough battle fighting against the brain wanting to remember and I know to remember those difficult calls can be detrimental to me personally.  I KNOW that I should not dwell on those calls and work through them.  It is difficult though when I may face the same type of call multiple times within the month or even the same week that compounds the healing process.  I have to dig deep within my bag of tools I have learned through counseling and trial and err to ensure I do not become consumed by those memories.

Those same tools need to be utilized in my day to day stressors in life.  Each life comes with difficulty and so often I have to find ways to get through them, at times weeks or even months.  The joy can be as if it is hidden within a word search and I have to find it in the dark.  Working at a stress-filled job certainly has not made me a pro at handling tough days or periods of life or given me the ability to make good decisions such as I have to do in my job which have to be done in a manner that makes the difference between life and death.  I have to take the same tools I use to work through those tough calls into my personal trials.  

Through my fifty-four years of life and through my chosen path of work I have learned that life is simply too short. In life there is pain and each of us will makes mistakes that will haunt us to the very end of our lives, and at times it seems we carry the weight of the world on our shoulders. The biggest lesson learned though is to take that extra moment to hear that little one laugh and memorize the dimple when they smile.  Kiss the chunky cheeks and feel the stress quietly slip away for a moment.  I have found the most simple joy that fills me to the deepest parts of my soul through the smiles and laughter of my grandchildren.  They allow me the grace to let it all go.  Tomorrow will be a new day with new stressors but for today I will smile along with them and bring the sweet memories of my own children when they were little and the wonderful joy they brought me with those same smiles and innocent giggles.